August 31, 2011

The Mom (Woman) Pledge

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The Mom Pledge

I am proud to be a mom. I will conduct myself with integrity in all my online activities. I can lead by example.

I pledge to treat my fellow moms with respect. I will acknowledge that there is no one, "right" way to be a good Mom. Each woman makes the choices best for her family.

I believe a healthy dialogue on important issues is a good thing. I will welcome differing opinions when offered in a respectful, non-judgmental manner. And will treat those who do so in kind.

I stand up against cyber bullying. My online space reflects who I am and what I believe in. I will not tolerate comments that are rude, condescending or disrespectful.

I refuse to give those who attack a platform. I will remove their remarks with no mention or response. I can take control.

I want to see moms work together to build one another up, not tear each other down. Words can be used as weapons. I will not engage in that behavior.

I affirm that we are a community. As a member, I will strive to foster goodwill among moms. Together, we can make a difference.

* * * * *

"There seems to be no end to the topics that can generate controversy. A recent poll of Mom bloggers revealed 76% had experienced or witnessed cyber bullying between moms on online."

You know, I think this is a great idea, a great pledge to take, a great word to spread.

But it shouldn't even be an issue!

Cyber bullying of moms?

Really, people?

Shame on anyone who picks on a mother.  Extra shame on a mom who picks on a fellow mom.

In my 11 years as a mom I have learned that each and every one of us is doing the best we can with what we've got.  We ALL love our kids.  We ALL want the best for them.

There is no argument about that.

Anything else we could argue about, is all personal choice and opinion.  And you can't tell people how to feel, what to value, what you think they should be doing.  Even if someone asks your advice, still the only thing you can offer is your personal opinion.  The other person doesn't have to agree.

Is that annoying?  I know, right?  But....

We should be kind, caring and compassionate enough to have healthy debates that don't denegrate one another.

I know it's frustrating when you don't agree with something someone's doing.  I get frustrated all the bloody time (hence Fantasy Eff Off Fridays)!  Venting is healthy. Attacking is not.  We are ultimately only responsible for our own actions, our own stuff.

And we are responsible for what we put out there.

"Life is like a boomerang; what you give, you get back."

If we want support, we need to give it.  If we want understanding, we need to give it.

Moms really need these things.

Women in general need these things.

Why do you think there are so many women/mom bloggers?

We should support and try to understand one another EVERY DAY.

No jealousy, spite, conceit or negativity.

I hope, here in my personal Internet space, that I am putting out positive energy more than I'm not.  I hope that my posts make people smile. When I do write about sad or difficult things, my hope is that I will be given support and understanding.  I also hope I am succeeding in giving these things to others.

The last thing any of us needs to do is tear another woman down.  We do enough of that to ourselves.

"There is a special place in hell for women who do not help other women."
~Madeleine K. Albright

We say we want strong female relationships, yet we so often do things to undermine them.  Our busy lives, obligations, assumptions and insecurities all get in the way.  I'm guilty of it.  Perhaps you are too.  We can always try harder.  Just be real, honest, kind and loving, and hopefully the rest will take care of itself.

So here's to you, my fellow moms, fellow women!


  1. Amazing, isn't it? We're supposed to be adults, and role models. And some of us are bullies?! I don't get it.

  2. Awesome post my dear!!! It all goes back to the old adage . . . if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all.

  3. Fantastic post! I really enjoy your blog! I found you via whatever wednesday and I am now following!

  4. I will never understand bullying or why people feel the need to be mean and judgmental. Why can't we all just be nice and support one another?

  5. Fantastic post! So well said. I wish there wasn't a need for The Mom Pledge, but every single day I am reminded that there is. Thank you for being part of our community, and helping spread POSITIVE energy around the blogosphere and beyond!

  6. Awesome post! Yes, we do all want the best for our kids and just b/c we do things differently doesn't mean we are doing them wrong. It really gets under my skin when I hear other moms ragging on each other.

    I like the quote about life being like a boomerang. Very true.

  7. Great post! It kind of horrifies me that there has been cyber bullying among grown women. I have never witnessed it, but this pledge wouldn't be necessary if it never happened. Ridiculous.

    Thanks for linking up to the Whatever Wednesday hop today!! :)

  8. Amen! And that Albright quote? Love! Pure love!

  9. Fantastic post!! Well said! I've never understood the need to bully! I didn't like it in high school and I darn sure don't like it as an adult!

  10. As I've seen the Internet grow from cryptic monosyllabic grunts to a true community of like-minded people, I'm particularly impressed with this post.

    Never mind that Jennifer is my daughter.

    Never mind that I don't agree with everything in this post.

    Fact is... that the true emotion and support and the feelings that she and her fellow bloggers emit, is the real story of women and moms in America today.

    Great post, Jen... one of your best. <3

  11. AMEN! It really kills me that sometimes people act so much like they did in high school...I even have a post about it :) Hope you have a wonderful weekend!