June 18, 2013

Filled With Gratitude

If I could only move through ignore get over let go of set aside the anxiety and worry I feel thinking, "when will the other shoe drop?", I could maybe actually just be HAPPY that things are OK right now.

I am happy.

I am so very grateful that my husband is still with us.

After all that he's been through, I look at him lately and am filled with gratitude and happiness.


Not in the off-handed way people use the word "amazing".

More like this, quite literally:

There are so many instances when he could have died. Times before I even knew him, let alone since. He has been fighting to live for SO LONG. And so far, it's working.

Diabetes has not been kind to Mark. It seems that no matter how hard he tries he is plagued by one complication after another. This isn't likely to change. He will probably never get another transplant and the disease will continue to take its toll.

Now, though? Right now? He's doing fairly well. He is constantly struggling with his blood sugars, made more difficult by insulin antibodies and electrolyte fluctuations due to being on dialysis....

But he is holding his own. He is happy and living his life as fully as possible. Still working, taking care of everyday things, cooking, being a dad, husband, son, friend, handyman...MARK.

I am so grateful!

I'm just so happy he is HERE.

It is a gift. An AMAZING gift.

I will never, ever take it for granted.

Connecting with Pour Your Heart Out, The Happiness Project and iPPP.

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