The Longest Haircut EVER

source

Not long as in, long hair. Long as in IT TOOK TWO FREAKING HOURS.

I have had a short hair style for about 3/4 of this year. It's like an inverted bob, short in the back, about down to my jaw in the front. With layers and texturing and stuff.

It's a bit more complicated than a straight, blunt trim. But not some crazy difficult style either.

Our local community college has a cosmetology school located right here in our town. Haircuts, regardless of style, length or whathaveyou, are only $8. My family has been getting our haircuts there for years.

They are pretty awesome. You get a cheap haircut because you let students play with your hair. But never fear, there are teachers overseeing everything; the student talks with a teacher about how they plan to cut your hair before starting, and a teacher checks their work when they're finished.

I have never come out looking like a monster. In fact, my daughter went IN looking quite ridiculous after taking scissors to her own hair, and came out looking much better.

However, I have also never had a haircut take two whole hours!

Students do cut your hair slower than someone who has more experience. So you have to go into the school knowing it will take a bit longer.

Not that much longer, though. Seriously, it was awful.

The girl they had do my hair was obviously brand spankin' new. Not only that, she seemed to naturally move in slow motion. She walked me back to her station slowly, back to the wash sinks slowly. Everything....slowly.

So I shouldn't have been surprised by how long cutting my hair took, right? Well I'm sorry, I was utterly beside myself!

I kid you not, I wanted to say something to her so badly, but I'm a huge chicken about that sort of thing.

Inside I was all, "Get this effing haircut done and let me get the hell out of here!"

It took so long I got really anxious thinking I just might HAVE to say something to her face about it.

Mark got a haircut at the same time. His stylist was done way before mine, so he sat and watched. He told me she looked scared. He said she would hover over my head with her scissors poised to make a cut, but take several moments to follow through. He was sitting there silently cheering her on, "Make the cut! You can do it!" He also said the instructor gave him a few looks of apology.

I sat in her chair and nearly fell asleep. At first I didn't care. Going to get my haircut is a fantastic excuse to sit and relax. But once I realized just how long this was taking, and that we were going to need to get home for the kids, I started getting really impatient.

She had trimmed up the back, and even done some snipping in the front. I thought she must be almost done. Instead, she gets her instructor, asks him a question and he shows her a little something. Suddenly it was like she started all over. She kept snipping and snipping and snipping at the back of my head. It took everything in me to not jerk my head away and yell, "Please back away from my head. Put the scissors down. Just stop the cutting! STOP IT!!"

When she moved to the front of my hair I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe she still had more to do. At that point I realized that the two students on either side of me had each done two cuts while I was sitting there. I also noticed how chatty those other stylists were with their clients, while mine was concentrating too hard to hold a conversation.....yet still taking FOR-EV-ER.

Finally I started dropping hints. I asked Mark what time it was. I mentioned the kids coming home from school. Mark pointed out how we hadn't even had lunch. I said I was so hungry I had a headache. He said he was starving to death. I let him LEAVE to get some BBQ from across the street. I wasn't worried he would take too long because this chic was clearly not done with me!

Finally -- FINALLY -- she called her instructor over one more time. After two hours of working on my head, he still had to fix a couple things. He tried to hand the scissors back to her to do the fixes herself, but she asked him to just do it because I had been in her chair too long.

THANK YOU GOD!

I am really not trying to pick on the poor girl. I'm actually trying to illustrate the humor in the whole thing. On the way home Mark and I shared what was going through our heads in those two hours, and giggled....shaking our heads and giggling some more.

It was just.....Yeah. And...Wow.

__________
This post concludes NaBloPoMo 2012! I made it! I sincerely hope you have enjoyed the ride more than I have. I will now remove my hands from the keyboard and slowly back away from my blog for at least the weekend....

Thankful Thursday

It is the last Thursday of November, and THIS CLOSE to the last day of the month.

Can I have a WOOHOO!?

I don't know what it is about the end of the month. It's not just that I can see the end of NaBloPoMo in sight. I get antsy like this at the end of every month.

I complain that time goes by so fast, yet I am always eager to start a new month. This makes no sense and I cannot explain myself....

You're getting off topic, Jennifer.

Gratitude. Right!

• I am thankful for plenty of turkey leftovers and Mark's (well, Emeril Lagasse's) turkey pot pie.
• Homemade cranberry sauce that has completely ruined the idea of ever letting canned pass these lips again.
• Wine Club Wednesday with my best gal pals. And the 80s. And Rock of Ages. The three all together made for one bitchin' night!
• My resolve in telling AJ he cannot have a stupid slushie maker for Christmas.
• The love and laughter that fills this house. My husband and kids crack me up, and it makes me love them all the more.
• Looking forward to Mark and my dad doing some electronics rearranging in our living room next weekend, and how much better it's going to look. This may make Christmas decorating a little slower, but it will be worth it.

What are you grateful for this week?

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What I don't want for Christmas this year

Haha!

Can I say some things without it sounding awful? Will I sound rude or ungrateful?

Anyone who reads my blog should know better.

There are a kabillion things I can think of that I want for Christmas, but there are also a few things I don't want. They can be kind of hard to say, however, because they could offend someone.

Such as....

I don't want Christmas dinner. I know my husband loves making it. And it's always delicious. And of course I don't hate it. But.....it's just all this work that I have to clean up and Christmas itself is a lot of work and....why can't we just chill?

Luckily, with a little coaching on just the right language to use from a friend, I managed to talk Mark into doing our big meal on Christmas Eve instead. I had to be very careful how I presented the idea to him because cooking for people is a big way Mark shows his love. I brought it up last year and it was like I stuck a knife in his heart.

I don't want to be asked what I want for Christmas. Of course I don't mind the desire to give me a gift. Who would? There's stuff I want! The thing is....if you feel close enough to me to want to give me a gift, shouldn't you be able to think of something I'd like? Because when you ask me what I want, it makes me feel like I'm asking you to give me something. And then I feel greedy (I already feel bad enough for specifically asking my friend Jessica to make me a knitted purse). I know that's not your intention, but it still feels that way.

I really think we should only ask kids what they want. Because  rattling off their little list is fun for them. Thinking of something to give someone shouldn't be that hard. All you have to do is think about what interests them. Do they have any hobbies? What do they do every day? Think about their home. If you're still stumped, gift cards are awesome!

My BFF is most excellent at taking note of things I say in email conversations with her and using those tidbits to come up with gifts I always like.

I don't want it to just rain. Is it really too much to ask for a white Christmas? I'm talking to you, Mother Nature.

I don't want my husband to have any new medical problems. Christmas Day 2008 he had his first heart attack. Christmas 2010 he was just recovered after bypass surgery. Only days before Christmas last year he had to have an infected chest wire from his bypass removed. In fact, I'll be hard-pressed not to be holding my breath as Christmas approaches, I think.

I don't want to be scolded for not phoning family members on Christmas Day. This I really resent. Why should it matter one iota who calls whom on a holiday? Does it specifically have to be children calling parents? Why can't it be the other way around, as long as we connect somehow? AND, if I remind my husband to call his family, should I be lectured on the insensitivity of it all when he forgets? I think not.

What you're saying by expecting ME to be the one who calls is that you're too stubborn to pick up the phone yourself. We have kids to pay attention to on Christmas. There are gifts to open, wrapping to clean up and toys to pry out of their packages and make work. Somewhere in there we also need to eat and take a breath. Doesn't mean I don't want to talk to you and wouldn't love to wish you a Merry Christmas. I just may very well forget to be the one to make the call.

Really, the older I get, the more I just want a peaceful, happy day during which I can do whatever I want and nothing I don't. I want to watch my children delight in their new treasures, sip on drinks, nibble on treats, give lots of hugs and I love yous and call it good.

Is there anything you DON'T want for Christmas? Is there anything you feel obligated to do, but really don't want to?

Tuesday

Have you noticed that Tuesday is like a nothing sort of day?

Monday is the hated first day of the week. Wednesday is "hump day" God, I hate that phrase. If anyone ever tells me "happy hump day" I will punch them in the mouth! Every single time I see someone post that as their status on Facebook I wanna tell 'em off. Thursday means the next day is Friday. Friday is the beginning of the weekend. And, well, the weekend doesn't need to be anything as it's cool all on its own.

Tuesday is non-descript. Movies being released for purchase and new music come out on Tuesdays. That's cool, but is it something we consider a thing?

Nope. Tuesday means nada.

Holidays are never on Tuesdays (this Christmas not withstanding). Pretty sure the only notable thing that regularly happens on a Tuesday is Election Day, and let's face it, that is not a happy day for about half of voters.

Yep, the only thing going for Tuesday is that it is the day of the week the most babies are born. I was born on a Tuesday. So was my daughter. Lemme tell ya, the day Camryn was born the hospital had to open their extra maternity wing. I almost delivered in a tiny little recovery room.

I kind of think Tuesday is terrific. It's usually a good day for my husband because he doesn't have to dialyze. The kids usually have school. I don't have to listen to anyone bitch about how much they hate Monday. And hey, if I want to, I can declare it Taco Tuesday. I love tacos.

This particular Tuesday, it's not going to rain, I have a therapy appointment and I can walk home from it in the crisp autumn sunshine.

What's not to love?


PS: Today is the first ever #GivingTuesday. Go do something nice and charitable. We'll be taking food items we don't need to our son's school for their food drive. :-)

NaBloPo-effing-Mo

10 Reasons NaBloPoMo is Pissing Me Off*

1. For me, it's making me post things that I'm not completely satisfied with, just because I have to post something.

2. That's not supposed to be the point, but I just can't put as much effort into 30 posts in 30 days as I otherwise would.

3. Therefor, I am not as proud of my posts right now.

4. I think perhaps NaBloPoMo isn't actually for someone like me, who has something of a regular posting rhythm.

4. It is more for those who are inconsistent bloggers and need to push themselves to post more often.

5. Sure, I take lots of pictures with my phone, but I can't imagine anyone needs to see any more of them than I already share.

6. And sure, I'm a little crafty, and I cook a little, but this is not a craft or cooking blog, so posting things like that should not dominate.

7. Erica at Yeah Write has been so supportive, even inviting those on the NaBloPoMo grid to enter posts on the challenge grid. But, see #3.

8. I could have written about choosing baby names for today's Listicle, but....meh. Do you really want to know how we arrived at our children's names? Most of you have never even asked what AJ stands for. If it weren't for NaBloPoMo I probably just wouldn't have posted today. But because I must bow down to the National Blog Posting Month gods, here I am butchering a Listicle....

9.  ....complaining about NaBloPoMo. Because I chose to do it and I'm too stubborn not to finish, but I'm not really enjoying it!

10. Will someone PLEASE make sure I don't sign-up for it next year?? I mean, seriously, reach through the computer screen and slap me if I even mention it!

I bet a bunch of bloggers are really diggin' it. I honestly thought I would too, because I did last year. I have learned a thing or two along the way, which is always a good thing. But....I think I'm at a point with blogging where I just don't need any challenges.....

You know what it is? Blogging is not supposed to be challenging. It is supposed to be the one thing in my life that is pretty easy. I feel like writing all the time. But if I don't feel like it, I don't have to. Right now though, NaBloPoMo is saying I have to. It's like it thinks it's the boss of me.

Well screw you, NaBloPoMo! I will finish out the week and then NEVER AGAIN.


*Could be that I'm just in a bad mood, frustrated, PMSing or fed up with something else entirely and choosing to take it out on NaBloPoMo**.

**Whatever.

Fall, Finally

Picasa says I have 117 pictures in my Fall 2012 folder. I've shared some of them along the way, but I thought it might be cool to put together a sort of "Autumn photo log", if you will.

This fall in the Pacific Northwest was pretty amazing. We had stellar weather well into October. Even as it was gradually cooling down, the sun remained in full force.

Probably the rain was tired and decided to take a little vacay. It does put in quite a bit of overtime around these parts.

All the extra sun gave us bountiful color!

Alright, I suppose I should stop. I know Autumn doesn't technically end until nearly Christmas, but it's beginning to feel a lot like winter now.

Isn't where I live beautiful? Would you believe I took all of these pictures just around my neighborhood? It's true! Imagine how much more beautiful going up to that mountain is.....

Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving and aren't being trampled in your local Walmart!

Thankful Thursday: Thanksgiving Day

On Thanksgiving 2012 I am thankful for:

The number  one thing, after last March, my husband still being here

to celebrate another Thanksgiving with us.

My beautiful, bright, healthy children.

They light up my life, and without them I would not be whole.

Our cozy little home.

(In spite of any roof leaks.)

My parents.

My extended family which includes two grandmthers still living,

aunts, uncles and cousins, as well as my in-laws,

including Mark's 90 year old sainted grandmother.

The delicious food my husband will cook today.

My dad being here for us, and us for him.

The bigger picture.

Having faith that there is reason and purpose

and much to be learned.

Laughter.

The lovely people we call our Friends.

Walking, Wine and Whipped Cream.

YOU lovely people who are my online friends!

I wish you a THANKFUL  and yummy Thanksgiving!

And leave you with my son singing a song he learned at school:

Dinner Bells Dasing through our food With a knife and a fork so fast, Corn and peas do go, while through my throat they pass. Into my tummy the plop. Making growling stop. Oh what fun it is to eat and eat until we drop! Oh dinner bells, shotgun shells, turkey got away. What are we supposed to do on this Thanksgiving Day-ay? Dinner bells, shotgun shells, turkey got away. What are we supposed to do on our Thanksgiving Day!
HAHAHA!

Watching Parenthood

The TV show Parenthood is killing me right now.

Like bawling my eyes out just about every time Adam and Kristina are in a scene, killing me.

If you don't watch this show, it is about the Braverman family, consisting of the parents/grandparents, their four kids and their spouses, and the four kids' children. The oldest of the four, Adam, is married to Kristina and they have three children.

This season, Kristina is going through breast cancer. They are portraying Adam and Kristina's experience in just about the most REAL way I have ever seen on television. Because it's so true to life, it's hitting me hard.

Mark points out that he doesn't have cancer. I point right back that it doesn't flippin' matter. Major health problems are major health problems. I just KNOW how it FEELS.

This couple reminds me so much of me and Mark. The feelings that are coming up for them are the same feelings we often have or have had. The episode that aired last week hit so close to home.

In one scene Kristina calls Adam and complains about having his mother there helping her. But it's not really about how her MIL is helping so much as she needs the help in the first place. She's just angry that she can't do everything herself right now. You see Adam on the other end of the phone just listening to her. All he says is I'm sorry and I love you. Because that's all he can say.

In another scene Adam's brother Crosby takes him out for a beer. Adam tells Crosby about how a neighbor came up to him the other day and said something like "God doesn't give you more than you can handle". Adam then says to Crosby, "Like that helps me watch my wife suffer!"

Cut to me, sitting on my couch, doing the ugly cry.

Even now, I'm getting teary writing about it.

People mean well. They want to help. They want to do or say SOMETHING that will somehow lift the burden from you even just for a moment. I get that and it's so nice. Believe me, those dealing with health problems do appreciate the effort.

But sometimes there just isn't anything people going through things like this need to hear besides, "I'm sorry" and "I love you". A lot of times, that's enough.

The person going through it doesn't want to be treated differently, and the person who loves them just needs to know you're there.

Being the spouse of someone with health problems brings this show so much closer to my heart. Having lost a friend to breast cancer does too. Watching it hurts right now. But I have to keep watching. Somehow it's....cathartic or something. It's identifiable. And it's being very well done.

So I guess every Tuesday night for the foreseeable future I will clutch a pillow and a tissue, nodding knowingly, and crying along with Adam and Kristina.


This is one of the best scenes so far.

Why Thanksgiving is Important All On Its Own

For so many years now, perhaps my entire adult life, I have felt like Thanksgiving is paid only lip-service by the masses. As if it is merely a "gateway holiday", if you will, to the real Holiday season that includes Hanukkah, Christmas and the New Year.

Christmas decor is displayed for sale in stores BEFORE Halloween now (I even saw some at the end of August while getting my kids ready for back-to-school). This year, I started seeing holiday-themed commercials the DAY AFTER Halloween.

I tweeted about it:

As Thanksgiving approaches, everything seems to really be more about Black Friday. And, oh yeah, get all your Thanksgiving dinner needs here too.

I understand that we want to plan out our holiday season so as not to leave it all for the last minute. And believe you me I love a great deal as much as the next gal. Hanukkah begins on December 8 this year. So yeah, those who celebrate the Festival of Lights are getting down to the wire.

I celebrate Christmas so I can only speak to that holiday. There is more than a MONTH between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Is that really not enough time to eat, sleep and breath it?

Every year I feel like I need to defend Thanksgiving. That people need to be reminded that it's about so much more than stuffing our faces and watching the Dallas Cowboys play football.

It is called "Thanksgiving" because it is meant to be for Giving Thanks. Regardless of the exact details of its origins in American history, it is at its heart a day to stop and appreciate life by celebrating with a feast, shared with family and friends.

It is good and right and healthy to count your blessings. Saying "thank you" for the things that really matter centers us, gives us perspective. It helps us learn to not sweat the small stuff and, dare I say, find contentment. If you have some good food to eat and someone to share it with on Thanksgiving, you have a lot.

So I implore you, continue to think of Thanksgiving as it's own special day. Please don't ever think of it as merely Black Friday Eve. And don't keep your gratitude to yourself. Say it. Share it. People need to hear it.

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Yarn Your Yule

I knitted a bunch of these cute little tree ornaments last year.

(Although that is not a picture of one of mine. I am apparently a big moron and either didn't take, or didn't save, any pics of mine. Ahem.)

They are so quick and easy! They are also easy to mail, since they are small enough to fit into a holiday card envelope.

Here's the pattern (that I got from....somewhere??):

*I used size 7 needles and cotton, worsted weight yarn

Cast on 16 sts

Gst 3 rows

*K2tog, k to end, K2tog (14 sts)

Gst 2 rows*

Repeat from * to * until 8 sts remain

Inc 2 sts at each end of next row (12 sts)

Gst 2 rows

Repeat from * to * again until 6 sts remain

Inc 2 sts at each end of next row (10 sts)

Gst 2 rows

Repeat from * to * again until 4 sts remain

K2tog twice (2 sts)

Gst 2 rows

K2tog (1 st)

Bind off and cut leaving long thread (for loop to hang)

To Finish:

Darn in cast on thread length. sew length of thread at top of tree into a loop for hanging and decorate if you want! (glue and sequins, for example)

They were truly so easy and fun.

A couple other Christmas-y things I did with yarn last year was to crochet some garland for my banisters and a couple of little squares for candle jars to sit on. I would have done circles, but I had only just learned how to crochet.

These are just a few simple ideas for using yarn to help deck your halls. There are many, many others out there. I highly recommend Ravelry for TONS of knit and crochet inspiration, whatever your skill level.

Merry Yarning!

Thankful Thursday

As I start writing this on Wednesday, I am not oozing gratitude. I have been out of Paxil for two days. A computer glitch this morning was the straw that sent me into tears. I felt angry at Mark for not going to the pharmacy to pick it up when I know that whenever he is out of one of his myriad prescriptions he doesn't hesitate. But I suppose Paxil isn't life or death....

And then I started arguing with my mother on Facebook. Good times.

But like I say, there is always something to be grateful for, and by God, I will find it!

After the long holiday weekend I am thankful for QUIET. The kids went back to school yesterday, but it wasn't until today that I got to be alone. I ended up pretty much taking a "mental health day". That's a thing, right?

Velcro has made it possible for us to put off teaching AJ to tie shoes for nearly 7 years. However,  he needed sturdier, lace-up shoes. We're working on it. I am grateful for patience.

I am thankful for the deliciousness that is my favorite teriyaki and their $5 lunch special!

Regardless of what I said above, I am so very grateful for my sweet husband who, although utterly bewildered by my emotional state, which by the way is exacerbated by being on a birth control pill (I mean, I am putting EXTRA estrogen into  my body!), just gave me hugs.

What are you thankful for this week?

SAHM vs. Homemaker

There is a difference between being a stay-at-home mom and a homemaker.

At least, there is for me.

I did not choose to stay home for my kids because I wanted to be a domestic goddess.

I chose to stay home because I did not have a job that payed enough to justify putting my child in day care. I would have been working just to pay for child care. But beyond that, I've always felt like my biggest calling in life was to be a mom. I am not career-driven.

However, this does not mean that I am inherently inclined to domesticity. I take CARE of things, not necessarily make sure they're squeaky clean, folded neatly and smelling fresh.

In fact, when I got my first apartment, I pretty much only did chores when I HAD to. Mark had to coax me, and even teach me, some things (especially cooking).

It's not that my parents didn't teach me how to keep house. They totally did. That was the problem. I had LOTS of chores growing up, so by the time I was an adult and didn't have to do them for my parents, I didn't want to do them for myself.

I was all, I'm the boss of me now, bitches!

Slowly over the years I got better. I learned that doing the dishes after dinner is a good thing and keeping up on laundry is far less overwhelming than letting it go for weeks. When Camryn was born, keeping the floors clean for her sweet little crawling baby self became important to me.

Still, I've never kept an immaculate house. That, my friends, is a LOT of work! It kills my back to scrub the tub and dusting is like, my most loathed chore. My step-mother had a zillion knick-knacks so I had to move each one to dust and I HATED it. To this day I am not a big fan of knick-knacks.

If I'm being completely honest, which I always try to do here, I don't SEE a lot of the dirty. Out of sight, out of mind. That is, until it gets bad enough for me to see. So that should mean I do regular maintenance, right? Yeah, totally logical. Yet, no.

Well, I DO do regular maintenance. My house is almost always presentable. But there's a lot I let go. And I kick myself for it because a really clean house would be nice. But on the other hand, it's so frustrating because it won't stay clean for more than 5 minutes!

It truly is a never-ending, and mostly LOSING, battle.

I also want balance in my daily life. A balance of have to and want to. I mean, there are more important things in life than cleaning. If a friend calls me up and asks if I want to go shopping with her, you'd better be damn sure I'm gonna say yes to my friend and put the chores off.

I want to take care of chores and responsibilities, AND have time for more enjoyable things.

I prioritize and I balance. So dusting my picture frames isn't on the list of priorities for months at a time. So what? I keep up on the cat box, vacuuming, dishes and laundry ALL THE TIME. I try to keep the house as de-cluttered as I can. I yell at everybody about their damn socks all other the place!

It's good enough.

That said, steam cleaning the carpet is on the to-do list RIGHT NOW. So there.

PS: If anyone ever came to visit I'd clean for them too!

Oh the things I'm learning....

I gave my friend permission to say "I told you so" to me about getting therapy. She totally didn't.

A few things have come together to make me see some things differently.

On November 2nd I saw THIS blog post, in which I read:

I remind myself that the act of facing the hardest moments will be what validates me the most. Then I lean into the pain.

Read it again. That's some seriously deep shit right there.

Just under a week later, my therapist says to me, "If you lean into the emotion, you can take a moment to experience it, and then move through it."

What did you just say? That's the second time I've heard something like that in a week!

Maybe I'm supposed to listen.

And learn.

I pride myself on being someone who learns through life, recognizing that I'm on a journey.

However, I'm not always a quick learner. I am when it comes to HOW to DO something. But not necessarily life lessons.

There are so many to learn!

So far in my 38 years I've learned:

• "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience; we are spiritual beings having a human experience." Pierre Teilhard de Chardin - This I have known from birth.
• While honesty is a good thing, so is tact. And kindness. Basically, think before you speak.
• Communication and forgiveness are necessary for a good marriage.
• Everything happens for a reason, and everything will be OK.
• Children need consistency.
• My head will explode when life gets too unbalanced.

This latest one, learning to "lean into the pain", is going to be critical for me.

I don't know why, but I FIGHT with my emotions. I try to push them away. I am afraid that giving into them will leave me a puddle on the floor.

My counselor asked what's so terrible about that. He says it's not like I'll STAY a puddle on the floor. I will always get back up.

I know he's right. I know I will always get back up.

The other thing I worry about is, well, everyone else. I feel like I have to protect my loved ones. I worry that if I melt down, they won't know how to deal with that. I don't want to scare anyone away.

Or they will judge me.

What I need to work on is learning to let myself have my emotions and just BE wherever it is I am in the moment, regardless of all that other crud. Because taking that moment and moving through it, rather than pushing it away, is ultimately less consuming. And healthier.

I need to be able to admit that I'm not in a good place. But I will be again soon. And let that be OK.

True or False

Heeheehee, Imma get tricky with you today.

You think you know me? Think you got the 411 on lil ole me?

Well let's just see about that!

Below I shall list 10 "facts" about myself. Only one will be true. It is your job to pick out which one.

Ready?

One of these things is not like the others....

1. I don't watch TV.

2. I've been to Europe.

3. I'm 28 years old.

4. I drive a Volvo.

5. I have three children.

6. My zodiac sign is Aries.

7. My favorite color is yellow.

8. I'm a Republican.

9. I hate "Big Hair Bands" from the '80s.

10. I have a dog named Julius.

Let me know which one you think is TRUE in the comments!

Veteran's Day

It is Veteran's Day in America.

Our veterans rock!

We just held a free election.

One of many.

We owe that to them.

Tomb of the Unknowns
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For as much as I appreciate our fantastic military and am so glad we have them,

what I'd really love to see come to pass are the words of Oliver Wendell Holmes:

Lord, bid war's trumpet cease;

Fold the whole earth in peace.

One day....

Am I too trusting and naive?

Maybe.

I prefer to look at it as I see the best in people and give the benefit of the doubt. That I'm not harsh, judgmental, cynical or unforgiving.

Sometimes someone I shouldn't have given the benefit of the doubt to shows me their true colors and I get hurt. But I also learn something. A couple of years ago someone I thought was a good friend to me showed me some things about herself that I decided I couldn't reconcile in order to remain friends with her. I realized I couldn't trust her and I need to have friends I trust.

With everything I deal with in my life, I just don't have the energy to pretend to be OK with someone I don't trust. Or who I think are just mean. But in general, I am a very trusting person.

The reason I'm thinking about this right now is largely due to the presidential election earlier this week. It was a hard-fought battle and people have expressed very passionate opinions on both sides. I expressed my own firmly held beliefs right here.

But I have been arguing my beliefs with members of my own family, including my husband who loves to play devil's advocate. Not that he totally disagrees with me, but Mark has pointed out this "issue" of maybe being too trusting and naive about some things.

Late on the night of the election I wondered if now that Obama has been RE-elected, if people could embrace and respect him. I asked this question on both Twitter and Facebook.

My thinking is that if the majority of voters want Obama as President AGAIN, maybe there is something to that, and maybe he is actually a GOOD President.

That's not totally unreasonable, is it?

The first opposing response I got was:

I don't believe in big government. I don't want the government telling me what to do and how to spend my money. I do not believe in re-distribution. If it's yours, you should be able to do what you like with it. Socialized medicine is not a good thing. Talk to someone that has been forced to live with it. The older and sicker you are, the less likely you are to get the best care possible. We already have a program for people who can't afford insurance, it's called Medicaid. The Bin Laden thing was a work in progress long before he came to office, I know this from someone who actually worked on it. I own a small business. If my business makes $250,000 or more a year, even if I don't take a salary or see any of that money, I am considered rich and will be taxed as if I were.

To which I replied, "So it's just all about money then. There's more to life than that." All I got back was, "Whatever!!"

The other comment was:

I respect the office but absolutely not this President. He has an ideology that is contrary and dangerous to this country and our constitution. He routinely proves himself to be a pathological lier. For what he did, or I should say, did not do, in Benghazi, Libya I hope he is impeached and prosecuted. I spent 4 years in the military and 30 years in law enforcement fighting for right against wrong and your right to free speech; please don't ever give that up; because this president is coming after it. You just don't know it yet.

I have made no response to this. I can't find the words.

Both the person quoted above and I question each other's sources of information. He highly reveres and respects Glenn Beck. I have actively avoided him. I feel that he is an extremist and an alarmist. This person thinks he only seeks the truth.

Truth is different for everyone.

I don't understand how they can feel the way they do, and I know they don't understand why I feel what I do. It's all very hard to reconcile.

I really don't think I am someone who shelters herself from information she might not want to hear. I don't watch the news as much as I used to, but only because I don't feel the need to hear about every single rape, murder or fatal car accident. It hurts my mommy heart too much. But I am online enough to hear about many other things.

As of now, President Obama has given me no reason not to trust him. I've seen only a caring, thoughtful, decisive and steadfast man. I've gotten no oogy vibes when listening to him speak. There has been nothing scandalous that I can point to and say, "Ooh, he's a bad man!"

Besides, we will do all of this again in just 4 more years, with brand new candidates. HERE's some excellent perspective if you need it.

Maybe I am naive and too trusting. But I think I'd rather be that than un-trusting, negative and angry all the time.

Thankful Thursday

I am grateful that I have started seeing a counselor. Today will be my third session. I feel like I am being proactive in how I handle the crud in my life. He inadvertently showed me something about Mark that will help me to better deal with some of the things he says to me that have thus far been very difficult for me to listen to.

I am very thankful that Mark had a great birthday, complete with cards and gifts and a lobster dinner from my dad! And SUN. It was raining when he came home from dialysis. He proceeded to expound on how it has rained every year of his life on his birthday....blah blah. I think God decided to get him and made the sun come out!

That sun let me have a fantastic walk. And yesterday after I showered and got dressed, I looked in the mirror and for the first time, thought maybe I look a little smaller than I used to. That feels pretty good.

And I am grateful the election is over and behind us. I am still more grateful that it was decisive, with Obama/Biden winning both the electoral and popular votes. I expected him to carry Ohio, but I am so pleased that he also won Florida. Also proud of the state of Washington for passing the legalization and taxation of marijuana, and for backing the state legislator in granting marriage equality. The times, they are a-changin'!

Won't you join me in expressing a little gratitude?

(Button in the sidebar.)

Happy Birthday, Husband!

My Dearest Mark,

Here is your birthday card from me. Of course I would publish it on my blog!
I mean, it is NaBloPoMo and all....

Forty-four years! My god, we're getting old. But YAY, we're getting old! Because, you know, earlier this year, we weren't so sure you'd see this birthday, right?

Wait. Let me rephrase that. YOU'RE getting old. Not me. Just so we're clear.

Excellent job getting here, my dear!

You know, some might call you an overachiever, what with all these miracles you seem to keep pulling out of your ass pocket.

We also call you the boy who cried wolf. My cousin says you're a big faker.
You know, just to keep you in line.

You really don't need to keep having near death experiences to get our attention!

I'm serious. Stop it.

Mark, I love you so much it....I mean....it's indefinable. I love you to the moon and back.
I love you HARD.

You are a part of me, the love of my life. You make me happy and worried. You make me laugh and you piss me off. And I love every minute of it.

I hope you have an awesome birthday during which you feel loved and have fun. Enjoy your new gaming chair and dinner out tonight. Don't worry about that thing you accidentally shoplifted from Walmart yesterday. We'll just call it their gift to you!

It's your birthday, now you're brand new So Happy Birthday to you!
All my love, Jen

Short-Term Memory

There are all kinds of things we remember over the course of life. Some big, some small. You remember something that someone else doesn't. We are molded by the experiences that become our memories.

Usually we think of stuff in years past. But what about things that have shaped us more recently? The things that will forever be locked away in our memory banks, but as yet still feel merely like recent happenings.

10 New Memories

1. Getting to show Lake Tahoe to AJ for the first time in August 2011

2. Seeing my Uncle Mark perform and then his death exactly a week later on October 22, 2011. The night of the day he died, how his loved ones all came together in his studio and were there for each other. Truly one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen.

3. On Christmas 2011 when we went to visit family at my Aunt Renee's. My Uncle Scott gave my kids these necklaces. The one he gave AJ was a shark's tooth. My uncle had no idea AJ would love that so much. (Sharks are one of AJ's very favorite things.)

4. Writing a special post to my husband at the end of January this year, not knowing what was coming.

5. The night of March 1, 2012. Well, technically March 2 at about 3:00 in the morning, getting a call from the hospital that Mark's heart had stopped, he was resuscitated and moved to ICU.

6. The way EVERYONE we love was there for us in some capacity the entire month of March. I will never forget how HELD I felt. How my friends hated to leave my side, how family flocked to Mark's bedside. Those memories help keep me going now.

7. My 38th birthday dinner at The Melting Pot in April. My first time. So fabulous!

8. Mark going back to work at the end of June. After what he went through in March, no one expected him to feel well enough to go back to work. He works less than he used to, but still. HUGE.

9. Both of our kids being away from us for over a week for the first time in August. And Mark and I getting to be alone together.

10.  Early memories from the current school year: the way AJ bounds happily in the door each day eager to do his homework and get out to play with his friends. This, from Camryn's Gateway teacher:

Camryn has had an outstanding quarter in my class.  The growth I have seen in her from last year to now has been incredible.  She is a much more confident learner.  I now see a student who is willing to take on all challenges.  In my class she has a solid A, a grade that she has earned through hard work.  I know one of your concerns was her unwillingness to seek help when needed.  No longer the case in my class, she has tremendous drive to complete her work and when she gets stuck she has  been asking for help without hesitation (a huge change from last year).

Come back later this week for the second November Thankful Thursday!

A crochet hat so easy even I can do it

I finally crocheted a hat!

Turns out the trick is counting your stitches so you know when you've completed a round.

Or don't count at all, just keep going and worry about filling in the last round at the end.

Well, that and some actually correct instructions.

Have you all heard of wikiHow? Well, that's where I got the directions I needed to crochet a simple beanie hat.

And then.....as it turns out, I didn't do my hat exactly as instructed.

I have no idea why. But whatever, because it turned out just fine, thankyouverymuch!

I used
1 skein Lily Sugar'n Cream cotton yarn
Size H crochet hook

How I did it (this hat fits my 12 year old daughter)
1. Chain 4
2. Slip first chain to form circle
3. Single crochet 10 into circle
4. Two single crochets into each stitch around (increased to 20 stitches)

5. Single crochet 20 around

6. 1 single crochet, 2 single crochets, 1, 2, 1, 2...around (increased to 30 stitches)
7. Single crochet 30 around
8. 1 single crochet, 2 single crochets, 1, 2, 1, 2...around (increased to 45)
9. Single crochet around and around til you run out of yarn!

You can count each stitch so you know when you start and finish rounds. You can join the rounds or do the super easy spiral thing.

You can do more or less increases depending on the size of the head you are crocheting for. Forty-five stitches was good for my daughter's head, and 50 seems to be good for me. Basically, you keep increasing until your work covers the crown of the recipient's head.

Rolled

Slouchy

Please let me know if this post is helpful to you. And if you make a hat the way I did, let me know how it works out for you!

Halloween Happened

We got so lucky! Mark was scheduled to work from 3-7:00 PM on Halloween, but when he got there, he was clearly not needed. So he got to come home and really DO Halloween for the first time since we bought this house.

That's right, this was a our 3rd All Hallows Eve here but Mark had not had good ones. In 2010 he had a toe amputated a few days before, and last year, he had teeth pulled.

Mark and the kids decorated outside and carved pumpkins. Then Mark donned an all black costume and sat outside waiting to scare unsuspecting trick-or-treaters. I heard some lady gasp too!

To top it off, the kids got to trick-or-treat on their own for the first time.

This is the pumpkin AJ picked at the patch. He and Mark collaborated on the face, Mark carved it and stuck the screwdriver in it's head.

This is Camryn's puking jack-o-lantern!

All the jack-o-lanterns! (and fog machine)

The porch. Can you see the bat dangling? It flew around.

Miss Vampiress

I think it's funny that my 6 1/2 year old can get one of these costumes, but he cannot watch the movie.

As for me..... I forced the kids to eat Gorton's fish fillets for dinner. Figured it was a good source of protein. Then I hid inside tweeting and crocheting.

Later, I ripped out my crocheting and started over. Mark and I got caught up on The Walking Dead, and after the kids were in bed, we watched Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.

Pretty good Halloween, I'd say!